The Focus On You

*Self-Care & Lifestyle Blog*

Tag: therapy (page 2 of 4)

No More Secrets: Healing From Domestic Violence- Book Review

This writer received this book in exchange for this review. All opinions are my own. 


“The more we tell our story, the more it loses its power.” Click To Tweet

I have been working with domestic abuse survivors for 4 years. There is power in their story. The quote mentioned above is a message I have shared with survivors when they begin trauma treatment.

I recently reviewed the book entitled “No More Secrets: Healing From Domestic Violence.” This story is told from the viewpoint of six domestic abuse survivors who used narrative storytelling to heal from their trauma. Thanks to their group and support system at The Second Step in Newton, Massachusetts, Allison, Becca, Cecilia, Donna-Marie, Olive and Selma received counseling, but also built a sisterhood within themselves. “They encouraged each other, they challenged each other, they’ve encouraged each other to be true to themselves, and in so doing they have discovered the profound healing power of connection.”


What makes this book unique?

  1. This book doesn’t just focus on red flags and traumatic stories. Part I did include chapters that told graphic stories of each woman’s background and experiences. But Part II and III shared solutions, the lessons they learned about safety, self-worth, lessons they learned from each other and parenting, to name a few.
  2. I appreciated the personal quotes that were woven between the chapters. And these are not clichés from professionals. These messages are from their voice and reflect how far they’ve truly come.
  3. I appreciate the informational blocks within each chapter that describe the dynamics of domestic violence, red flag behavior and boundary setting. For someone who is just learning about working with this population, these blocks of info help solidify the seriousness of intimate partner violence.

Who is this book for?

Social workers, nurses, medical professionals, domestic violence advocates, law enforcement personnel, probation officers, parents of teens, adult survivors of childhood abuse, graduate students who are entering the mental health field, addiction therapists, psychology students, legal advocates or paralegals, school personnel and university staff.


This story made me feel like I was within their support circle. I felt like I could hear the pain and fear in their voices as they recounted their personal experiences.

As a therapist for survivors, I recommend this book especially for support staff. Having an empathetic ear and understanding of their experience is important. Trauma informed care is becoming a standard for any helping professional and this book weaves in education AND intimate experiences.

If you would like to learn more about Second Step’s program, please find them here.

If you would like to pick up this book for yourself or someone you know, please click below!

No More Secrets: Healing From Domestic Violence

How Blogging Is Turning Me Into An Introvert

I have always been a social butterfly.

In my 20’s I loved college parties, dancing all night and being with large groups of people. Maybe it was the closeness with my sorority sisters. Living in close quarters throughout college doesn’t give you much alone time but I didn’t mind.

After I moved to a new city (Las Vegas) and away from most of my friends I focused on my career as a therapist. Don’t get me wrong. I enjoyed the Las Vegas nightlife while I was still young and single.  I even worked 2 jobs at an average of 50 hours a week and still travelled and socialized.

Move forward to 2016 and I’m married, working part-time as a mental health therapist and blogger. Blogging has really turned me inward in order to remain creative. Although my husband and I travel often and enjoy spending time with friends and family on weekends, I really crave my quiet time to work on the blog.

And I hate this.

In one sense it’s beneficial because I’m not afraid to work, create, write and learn. Human contact is also important as a busy entrepeneur.  Retreating to my shell too often isn’t healthy either (Did I mention I’m a Cancer too).

It’s as if “Focus On Me” has gone into overdrive. All this quiet time isn’t necessarily self-care time. I take my breaks and know my limits. I say “yes” to fun activities that I know will suit me and excite me.

Maybe this business is lonelier than I expected. Click To Tweet Thankfully Twitter chats and my Facebook groups provide the laughter, healthy feedback and flow of information necessary for growth.

In reality, therapy is also a lonely gig. You hear more heartbreak than success and can really only process it with your supervisor. You cannot talk in depth at home about client struggles or stories and basically have to keep work conversation at a surface level. In between sessions it can be hard to bounce ideas off colleagues because they’re swamped as well. This is one of the reasons I won’t enter private practice. My God-given extrovert personality wouldn’t survive.

Yet now I’m diving into the introvert pool.

I feel productive in this silence but still want to wade into your bangin pool party from time to time.

Do any other business friends or therapists sympathize???



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