The Focus On You

Self-Care Is A Lifestyle

Tag: mindset

Why Your Mindset Matters More Than Your Goals

As we prepare for a new year with goals, resolutions (ugh), vision boards, new planners and a bucket list, I think about how all these “goals” can be short sighted.

You know I’m never the one to crap on anyone’s dream but I want you to shift your perspective and possibly aim higher. Let’s face it, 2017 was a year of dramatic change, shifts and WTH moments. I truly feel that who we ARE needs to aim higher than what we want to DO. Click To Tweet

Let’s start off by breaking down the word “goal.”

A goal is the object of a person’s ambition. A goal should be committed to a person’s particular needs. If your goal is to lose weight I’m guessing that your “need” is to improve your health. As a college student my goal was to finish school so I could make more money in the future.

With any goal, you examine your HOW’s and WHAT’s. HOW will I reach this goal? WHAT do I need to do to make this happen?

I’m asking you to examine your mindset or the WHO. Who do I need to be in order to make this goal happen? Do I need to be motivated, patient or more extroverted (if you’re moving past comfort zones)?

Furthermore, how is this goal going to change who I am? Am I ready for the personal changes that may take place? When I first started this blog I didn’t imagine how much my mindset would change. I see business differently, learned more about the benefits of social media, exercised creative muscles I never knew I had (podcasting, public speaking) and networked with professionals. I can’t believe how much I have grown since I started blogging.

All of the goals I’ve achieved changed who I am. Undergrad. Grad school. Building my therapy career. Becoming a writer and blogger. If I didn’t like who I became after meeting these goals, how would that screw up my mindset for future goals? I’d never dream again.

Aside from viewing my own personal bubble I am taking the world view into perspective before planning for 2018. This year’s “power word” was bravery. Last year I knew that my goal was to strengthen my personal foundation and headspace while making dreams come true. I got distracted by world events this year and I lost focus. I put my energy into “BEING brave” and was unable to get things DONE.

(Read my post for a list of “power words.”)

For 2018 I am attaching BEING and DOING so I can stay aligned. For this reason, my “power word” is ALIGNMENT. A friend kept mentioning this word on social media and it stuck. I kept seeing this word pop up and like a soothing scent, it lingered.

My mindset has to be aligned with what I’m doing whether I’m walking the dog or working extra hours to achieve this new therapy license. With a shaky economy I realize that I need to keep building my resume and will be working on a new therapy license. Mindfulness and self-care will be paramount to my success (and sanity) in 2018.

My wish for my readers before the year ends? I hope you go for all your dreams and that it’s aligned with your needs, the best life for your future and who you want to be. Here’s to being focused and aligned in 2018!

P.S. If you’re a VIP newsletter subscriber, I’ll break down some more tools to help you visualize your goals for the coming year! Stay tuned!

Could You Benefit From A Coach or Mentor?

As I peruse through sample books on my tablet I see a popular theme popping up in business books. Mindset, mindset, mindset. At the same time I am seeing images of sports figures being celebrated for their triumphs. I’ll discuss the connection a little later.

  • Is mindset the same as attitude? Does your mindset need an adjustment?
  • Is our “mindset” a product of our culture or a product of our circumstances? Have our challenges in the past affected this?
  • If you struggle with mental health issues (depression, anxiety, etc) how difficult is it to pull yourself out of your “mindset?”

This is where I throw in the importance of mentors, coaches and therapists. How instrumental are coaches when it comes to championship sports? Horse trainers were celebrating the Triple Crown win alongside the horse owner and jockey. NBA coaches are highly scrutinized during the championship series and their team relies on their judgment and expertise throughout the game. Women’s World Cup started this weekend and I’m guessing that we will soon be hearing inspiring stories about the challenges faced by Team USA.

Mind you, I’ve never been an athlete but a therapist is a type of coach. When my clients have stabilized emotionally, I am able to coach them through life processes. I can be a cheerleader and a voice of reason (although the voice of reason pops up more than not).

As I have developed business connections through social media, I have encountered life coaches, career coaches and mentors. I realize that we all have a similar goal – helping YOU recognize your full potential!  

The difference between you improving your “mindset” and an athlete who improves his/her game, is that your competition isn’t standing in your way.

Unless you count yourself as your competition.

My challenge to you is to seek out the coach or mentor that will shake up your current mindset. Click To Tweet

And speak to yourself as you would speak to a child who you’re coaching through a new experience. That conversation wouldn’t sound the same as your inner dialogue would it???


Have you been contemplating therapy, life coaching, career coaching or seeking out a mentor? What’s stopping you?

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